It is important that every victim finds the strength within themselves to get empowered to stop their abuser and put them out of business, more so to hold them accountable for abusing them.  And when they are ready to do so, they should have the right support system to walk them through the process, make sure it is done with the utmost sensitivity shown towards them, and with the absolute thoroughness, efficiency and importance that their report deserves.

Understanding that reporting abuse to the appropriate authorities is the only way to have a record of abusers in each community.  If we continue to keep the secret that the religious Jew is yet a human being with human flaws and that there is also good and evil in our community, we allow the evil to win; we empower the evil in the community to rule over the good and decent people.  It is the evil in people, the yetzer horah that has made the biggest chilul hashem and gives the entire community a bad name.  It is time we exposed the evil and wiped it cleanly and clearly out of our communities.  Rip off the rugs and sweep the rooms clean and clear of all the old evil dust balls that were hiding under the rugs.  If it were possible, if only the yetzer horah had not gotten hold of the ones we should be able to trust.  If only the yetzer horah did not get hold of the ones we should be able to turn to, but its too late for that.  Everyone's got something on the other guy.  It is too hard to trust these days, our society is so corrupt.  We can't go to our own batei denim because we have no way of knowing who has what on whom, and who is going to be yashar and who is going to be bought off.  So we have to go to the local authorities and find a way to stop the evil but still maintain our halachic balance.

We have found two Poskim that said "if you know that the perpetrator will harm another person/child he must be turned into the authorities".  WE have quoted this to many others who still do not accept this psak.  In addition, I have a question that has been bothering me on this pask.  If the perpetrator is not turned in even on his/her first offense (and I can understand leniency and mandatory therapy for a first time offender depending on the circumstances), how can we know for sure if a perpetrator is committing a first or second (or more) offense.  If there is no record of his/her first offense how can one possibly know if he/she had done it before until the time when more than one victim comes forward and makes a public announcement as was the case with Kolko and Mondrowitz.  Even if the Rabbonim were to give a psak that "each offense must be reported to the authorities, however a first time offender must be shown leniency and must be treated differently than a repeat offender",  I could  understand that better because then there would be a record that he had one strike against him/her and if he did it a second time we would actually know that he did it a second time and not think that the second time was the first offense.

If anyone could explain to me how one would know, how one could determine whether it was an abuser's first offense in order to determine if that abuser will strike again.  Would you trust the abuser by asking him, "is this the first time you did this?"  Should we believe him if his answer was yes?  So I ask you, who are all very familiar to this subject and because many of you are therapists, the psak was that one should turn in the abuser to the authorities if it is determined that he is a threat or he will harm another; is it safe then to assume that if he abused once that we know of, he will definitely abuse again, or that because we have no way of determining that this was his first offense that he will definitely without a doubt do it again.

Sherree Belsky